Notebook
December 13th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,
Friday the 13th. This is the second “Friday, the 13th” for the year of 2013. In 2012 there were three “Friday the 13ths”. According to the Stress Management Center and Phobia Institute in Asheville, NC, an estimated 17 to 21 million people in the United States are affected by a fear of this day. Some people are so paralyzed by fear that they avoid their normal routines in doing business on this day. “It’s been estimated that $800 to $900 million is lost in business on this day..” source John Roach.
According to Wikipedia, the actual origin of the superstition appears to be a tale in Norse mythology. Friday is named for Frigga, the free-spirited goddess of love and fertility. When Norse and Germanic tribes converted to Christianity, Frigga was banished in shame to a mountaintop and labeled a witch. It was believed that every Friday, the spiteful goddess convened a meeting with eleven other witches, plus the devil – a gathering of thirteen – and plotted ill turns of fate for the coming week. For many centuries in Scandinavia, Friday was known as “Witches’ Sabbath.” source: Charles Panati, Panati’s Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things.
The APHC show this week is live from The Town Hall in New York City. Special guests include keyboardist and bandleader Paul Shaffer, singing trio The DiGiallonardo Sisters and soprano Ellie Dehn plus the Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Tim Russell, Sue Scott and Fred Newman. The News From Lake Wobegon will remind us of our “Christmas pasts”. Enjoy the show.
“The years teach much which the days never know.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

December 6th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

BRRR! Nine below zero on the Pontiac dash board display. The in-floor heat in the cottage is a little tricky to control but other than that it is a pleasant place to spend the winter. All because my Grandma’s mother, Anne Oien, received a letter from a man named Anderson, who wanted her to come to Minnesota from Norway to help him keep warm in his cot. If only she had got on the wrong train in Chicago and had ended up in Kentucky instead of St. Paul. Mr. Anderson would have found someone else to cuddle with and I would have been raising horses or at least shoveling manure in the sunshine.

A great oak fell yesterday. Nelson Mandela died South Africa at 95 years of age. He spent 27 years in prison and four years after he was released he was elected President of South Africa. The remarkable thing was that he was able to forgive his enemies. “Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.” Nelson Mandela

The APHC show this week is a live broadcast from The Town Hall in New York City. Special guests include British rock n roller, Nick Lowe and actress Debra Monk, plus the Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Sue Scott, Tim Russell and Fred Newman. The News From Lake Wobegon will remind us of who we are.

“A fundamental concern for others in our individual and community lives would go a long way in making the world the better place we so passionately dreamt of.”
Nelson Mandela 1918-2013

December 4th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,
Friendship
If one day you meet someone unique,
With a spirit kindred to yours,
When your hands touch in greeting, you feel you are meeting
Someone you’ve met before.
All in good time, you’ll be sharing good wine
Ideas and observations,
Exchanging notes and anecdotes,
Having great conversations.
No questions are asked, no answers are needed,
You accept this friendship with pleasure.
For a newfound friend in everyone’s life
Is truly a remarkable treasure.
For friends will celebrate each other’s joy,
Comfort each other in sorrow,
Be there forever, beginning to end,
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
The author of this poem is Gladys Hamilton. Next month she will celebrate her 94th birthday. She is the mother of my sister-in-law and I was blessed to have been able to spend Thankgiving Day with her yesterday. This summer she moved to Edina from Phoenix. She is a true Renaissance woman, a poet, artist, sculptor and a writer. You can learn more about Gladys at gladysandfriends.com

The APHC show this week is live from The Town Hall on West 43rd Street in New York City. Special guests include Vince Giordano and the Nighthawks, author Roy Blount Jr.and singers Heather Masse and Aoife O’Donavan. The Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Tim Russell, Sue Scott and sound effects man Fred Newman will entertain with some of your favorite skits. The News From Lake Wobegon will feature pumpkin pie.

“A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to leave alone.” Henry David Thoreau

November 22nd, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

Fifty years ago today, John F. Kennedy was shot and killed in Dallas, Texas. It was one of those events that, if we are old enough, we remember where we were when we heard the news. There are a number of comparisons between Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy.

1. Lincoln was elected to congress in 1846, Kennedy was elected to congress in 1946.
2. Lincoln was elected President in 1860, Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
3. Lincoln’s wife lost a child while living in the White House, so did Mrs. Kennedy.
4. Kennedy had a secretary named Mrs. Lincoln.
5. Lincoln was shot in the back of his head in the presence of his wife, as was JFK.
6. They both were shot on a Friday.
7. Lincoln was shot in the Ford Theater. Kennedy was shot in a Lincoln built by Ford.
8. Lincoln’s assassin, John Wilkes Booth, was know by three names, comprised of fifteen letters, same as Lee Harvey Oswald.
9. Booth was killed before being brought to trial. Oswald was killed before being brought to trial.
10. Lincoln’s successor was Andrew Johnson, born in 1808. Kennedy’s successor was Lyndon Johnson, born in 1908.

The APHC show this week is a rebroadcast of the all-things-banjo show from back in February. Special guests include, Joe Newberry on “Down the Road”, Bill Evans playing “Ragtime Episode”, Noam Pikelny’s “Broken Drought”, a three banjo version of “Arkansas Traveler” and a bit of history on the banjo from Bill C. Malone.
In the News From Lake Wobegon, the town prepares for the annual “Big Plunge”.

“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” From “The Hobbit” by J.R.R. Tolkien

November 18th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

I am now the proud holder of a “St. Cloud State University Driver Improvement Certificate”. This program is also marketed as the “55 Plus Improvement Program”. Had I signed up for this class when I was first eligible, I would have saved 10% per year on my auto insurance for the last 15 years. An estimated $900 of un-realized savings. Dumb! It is an eight hour course, but well worth the investment in time and enrollment fee.

I learned that if you are driving in a 55 mph or 60 mph zone, and you want to pass a slower driver, you are allowed to speed up to 65 or 70. This would not apply to any other posted speeds, only 55 and 60. I also learned that it is against the law to pass on the right except where there is a clearly marked lane for that purpose. I am not sure what the fine is, but the instructor made it sound like no small matter. There is no test to take at the end of the two evening course, so you have no excuse.

The show this week is a live broadcast from the Music Hall at Fair Park in Dallas, Texas. Special guests include conjunto kings Los Texmaniacs, country trio The Carper Family and singer Aoife O’Donovan. A special group, The Moonlighters, (Rich Dworsky, Richard Kriehn, Dean Magraw and Gary Raynor) will entertain, plus The News From Lake Wobegon. Enjoy the show.

“If you do not sow, you do not reap; no investment, no dividend. It’s as simple as that.” Alfred Armand Montapert

November 8th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

Twenty years ago today, Grandma Ramlo passed away. She was 20 days shy of her 98th birthday. It was “Gram” who taught me unconditional love. With your parents, it is hard to get unconditional love. There is too often, some strings attached. Parents feel like the world is judging them based on what their offspring do and say. With Gram, I could do no wrong. This was not always the case. When I was a child she was tough. When we were living above her grocery store she often fed us lunch. The rule was that you had to be in your chair at the table by the time the noon whistle stopped blowing. Upsala was small enough, so that if you started running when the whistle went off, you could get there before it was done blowing. I remember the time that I forgot the rule and when I opened the screen door, she slapped me across the face with a “You are late”. For that reason, I am almost never late for an appointment. I miss our Saturday morning visits in the Pierz nursing home and the special bars that she kept in her freezer.

The APHC show this week is a live broadcast from “The Chief”, an historic theatre in Bemidji. Special guests include prose poet Louis Jenkins and young singer-songwriter Sonny Johnson. The November Boys will join the usual cast of the Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Tim Russell, Sue Scott and Fred Newman. I have no idea about tickets. Maybe you should drive up there to see the Upsala/Swanville Patriots play in the high school football playoffs and buy a ticket from a scalper.

“The only reason you are happy is because you choose to be happy.” don Miguel Ruiz, author of “The Four Agreements”

November 1st, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

Where were you 22 years ago today? How much snow did you have to deal with? Today’s sunny cool weather is so much more comfortable than 24 inches of the white stuff. We were living in a townhouse in Blaine and the driveway was not cleared for days. We were running low on food and I am sure that I was freaking out since I was hooked on Diet Coke. When we lived on Cedar Lake west of Upsala, we used to enjoy being socked in by a blizzard. We usually had some notice and it usually was winter time not Halloween. In 1991 the freeways in the Metro area were a hazard to drive on most of the winter. It took a long time for the snow and ice to melt, in fact maybe it never did, until spring. 22 years is a long time ago. I drank my last can of Diet Coke on August 7th of this year.

The APHC show this week is live from the State Theatre in downtown Minneapolis. Special guests include the Pied Piper of Poetry, Billy Collins, mandolinist and bluegrass ambassador, Sam Bush, and men’s vocal ensemble Cantus. The Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Tim Russell, Sue Scott and Fred Newman will team up with Garrison to bring us the various skits. The News From Lake Wobegon will wrap it up.

“Reputation is what folks think you are. Personality is what you seem to be. Character is what you really are.” Alfred Armand Montapert

October 26th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

Next Thursday eve is Halloween. The kids will be out going door-to-door with ice-cream pails and sacks ringing doorbells and saying “Trick or Treat”. Wikipedia posts the following, “According to many scholars, All Hallows’ Eve is a Christianized feast initially influenced by Celtic harvest festivals, and festivals of the dead with possible pagan roots, particularly the Gaelic Samhain.”

“Typical festive Halloween activates include trick-or-treating, attending costume parties, decorating, carving pumpkins into jack-o-lanterns, lighting bonfires, apple bobbing, visiting haunted activities, playing pranks and” …. watching the Vikings play football. Nothing is scarier than that.

I trust that in your neighborhood, there will be nothing worse than toilet paper in your trees. I plan to place a large bowl of candy on the orange crate on the lighted front porch with a “Help Yourself” sign.

The APHC show this week is live from the Orpheum Theatre in Memphis, Tennessee. Special guests include, The Milk Carton Kids, singer Hilary Thavis and theatre organist, Tony Thomas, plus the Royal Academy of Radio Actors with a new voice, Beth Gilleland. Saxophonist Kenni Holmen joins The Guy’s All-Star Shoe Band. Enjoy the show.

“You have to have a tolerance for failure if you are going to do important things.” Warren Buffett

October 17th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

MEA weekend is a special time of the year. Many a father/son(daughter) combo head for the woods or ponds to bring home the “bacon” in the form of grouse or duck. Larry, a friend of mine who died way too young, knew that I had never taken up hunting, but he wanted my son and myself to experience a weekend of grouse hunting, up north at “the shack”. He invited our friend Ron and his son Matt, my son’s best friend, to join him and his son Danny. So there were three dads and three sons along with a black lab, “Bear”. We formed two teams and I was the “bird dog” on the dads team. Bear went with the boys.

The first day we brought back 17 grouse and Larry fixed a meal of grouse with wild rice and mushroom soup in the giant iron skillet that hung from a nail in “the shack”. It was one of the most memorable feasts of my life. I trust that you are doing something special with your family this weekend. If you want to see examples of other hunting experiences go to theoutdoorreport.com My son Erik has just posted a video about the Governor’s pheasant opener.

The APHC show this weekend is live from the Lied Center for Performing Arts in Lincoln, Nebraska. The show will feature special guest singer-songwriter, fiddler, and podcast host Sara Watkins. The Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Sue Scott, Tim Russell and Fred Newman will entertain you with a variety of skits. Enjoy the show.

“Do all you can, with what you have, in the time that you have, in the place where you are”. Okasi Johnson, 14 old aids patient in South Africa.

October 11th, 2013 by Gary Osberg

Good morning from Collegeville,

In September of 1956 I was enrolled in the eighth grade at the Junior High in St. Louis Park. The previous month my mother had given birth to her sixth child and Dad was once more in trouble. My mother’s mother, Grama Ramlo, drove her 1952 Chevy from Upsala to our rented bungalow at 1620 Colorado Ave in St. Louis Park, put my dad in the back seat, drove to the VA Hospital in Minneapolis and said, “Here, he is a drunk and he is your problem, not mine”. She then took her daughter and my five siblings into her house in Upsala. On October 1st, I rode my Schwin from Ramlo Grocery to the Upsala school. I had earned the money for my shiny new red Schwin delivery newspapers in our St. Louis Park neighborhood. Of course someone let the air out of the tires. I did get out of the 10 hours of detention that I had accrued at school in St. Louis Park.

The next Monday, the student body was ushered into the school auditorium to watch game five of the World Series. We watched Don Larsen pitch the only perfect game in post-season major league baseball history. He’d had a disastrous game two, lasting only two innings and allowing four runs on four walks. When he reported to the locker room that day, Larsen was astonished to see the baseball tucked into his shoe by the manager Casey Stengel. He faced 27 batters that day and not a single one made it to base.

The APHC show this week is a live broadcast from the newly re-opened Saenger Theatre in New Orleans. Special guests include country/folk singer and songwriter Iris DeMent, vocal powerhouse Jearlyn Steele and singer Hilary Thavis. Plus the Royal Academy of Radio Actors, Tim Russell, Sue Scott and Fred Newman will entertain us. The News From Lake Wobegon will wrap it up. Enjoy the show.

“Don’t let the noise of others opinions drown out your inner voice.” Steve Jobs